Focus Point
by Leki
Summary: Hannah has a hard time controlling her emotions. Failing to connect to her parents, her thumb hovers over Adam's name in her contact list. She doesn't realize she pressed Call, and Adam hears her hyperventilating on the other end. He decides to take an odd approach to her situation. Master/Slave Themes.


Hannah had called her parents, asking their opinions on some of her problems. She felt like she needed her parents' guidance. They delivered some guidance as per usual. She figured out midway that it hadn't really been cold information she had needed. She needed something emotional, but she couldn't bring herself to start that exchange with her parents. With a somewhat shakey voice, badly disguised by laughter, she hung up on her parents. She closed out of the phone call and went back to her address book.

Her thumb paused over Adam's name, wanting so badly to tap call, knowing full on well that that bridge had been burned. No, she had to figure this out herself. She thought of what he always called her, Kid. It always gave her tingle, but it also made her burn. She always came back to him to solve her issues. She couldn't keep relying on other people, especially him. She had to be an independent woman. Hannah sobbed and a choked whine came out of her mouth. The misery was just choking her up. This was just so fucking stupid. It's not like she had abusive parents. Her own mother even said she didn't know what was wrong with her, they'd never raised a hand to her. She'd never been sexually abused, or in war. God it was so, so, fucking stupid.

"Hello?" Adam said from his end of the phone. Hannah did not hear him. The phone had dropped from her cold, numbing hands onto the floor, and the blood was rushing in her ears. The breathy sobbing was loud in her chest as she started to pant. She was hyperventilating, and she couldn't stop it. She whimpered, counting and looking over her shoulder. She started crying when her numb hands wouldn't tap so she could count. She needed control over something, and she just didn't have any right now. Soon, she couldn't even count out loud, she was too busy trying not to pass out from breathing too fast.

"Hannah? Are you okay?" Adam asked, back in his apartment. He was sitting bolt up in bed now. She obviously wasn't talking, but he heard sobbing and panting. It was some of that 911 shit where people couldn't talk. He kicked himself up so hard he landed on his feet and ran for the door, barely stopping long enough to put on pants and hop into boots. He quickly knotted them and took off, taking the stairs four stairs at a time. He probably could have cleared the landing, but he couldn't risk breaking an ankle on the way to Hannah.

Adam paused at the doorway, knuckles barely knocking at the door, uncertainly filling him. What if Hannah didn't want him? The choice was made for him when he tuned in and heard sobbing coming from the kitchen area. He didn't have a key. Simple. He kicked the door in with a sharp, sure kick to the lock.

The sharp noise and the resulting banging against the wall should have had Hannah freaked out, but all it did was give her a small jolt. She was already too high to feel it. She had her arms crossed helplessly over her chest, fingers frozen in a clawed shape. Embarrassment surged through her, but she couldn't seem to get the panting under control. Panic fluttered in her chest, constant like it had it's own generator.

"Havin' problems kid?" Adam said, turning only long enough to fit the door back into the frame, and then started walking towards her. His normally goofy smile was really serious, his eyes unnerving and unblinking on her.

"Hahahahah!" Hannah started to life, high and breathless, "You-pant-could-pant-saythat-pant." Looking up at him made tears start down her face and she started sobbing helplessly. Even with him there, she flexed her fingers, trying to get them to start tapping. Hannah kept turning her head to side to side, counting. Adam came up in front of her, kneeling down. Adam put out his arms, hands hovering over her as if he didn't know where to start touching. He settled with pivoting and setting himself down beside her, legs crossed and arm around her.

"This is soooooooo stupid. I don't even have anything to worry about. J-J-Just some stupid b-book. And like, nothing much else." Hannah said.

"But it does matter. It matters enough for you to cry over it." Adam said steadily, not even having to think about it, "People always try to minimalize that shit. Even if it's not big, you shouldn't just. Get over it. It still affects you. It's gotta be dealt with."

"... I just can't get it out. I can't think of anything good."

"Well. What about stupid cats." Adam said, deadpan. Hannah giggled, but it was a fully anxious laugh.

"Yeeeahhh..." Hannah tried to talk, but got cut off, heaving and gasping air, "I can't. Can't get. Control." Her whole body shook as she panted. Her head bobbed down wearily. She was afraid she was going to pass out if she couldn't cut this off. Adam stared at her, looking at the shiny trail of tears going down her cheeks. Maybe she needed someone to take control. Like sometimes after a hard day, he liked it when she made him beg and focus on her.

Well, here went nothing. The worst thing that could happen was she'd tell him to stop. Which he would. Or she wouldn't quit panicking. And in that case he'd try something else. Adam slowly stood up and walked around in front of her, turning to face her.

"Hannah, sweetheart." Adam said, tacking on an endearment to soften what he was going to say, "Shut up." Adam crossed his arms and staring at her as he leaned at the wall. Hannah choked and her head snapped up to look at him. Good, she had quit that twitching shit. Whatever she had been doing, he knew it was something emotional manifesting as physical. He had to stop this shit at the source later, but for right now he'd deal with cutting off the affects.

"Adam?" She asked hoarsely, confusion all over her face.

"I want you to sit on your knees, hands in your lap. We'll call this position one." Adam said.

"Adam, I-I..." Hannah started, looking confused. She shook her head, tears spilling down again.

"No, don't think. Get on your knees." Adam repeated. For a long moment, Adam thought he was going to have to come up with a new approach. Maybe this approach was too weird or embarrassing for her. Then, she slowly got up. She wobbled as she did so, still feeling weak. He leaned forward, ready to help her, but she got on her knees, hands in her lap. She looked up at him, still breathing fast, but it was slowing.

Adam thought about making her drop her eyes, but he didn't want that. He liked the eye contact. Besides, it seemed personal how openly she was staring, unblinking and vulnerable, "Position 1, that's what this is called. Waiting." Adam said, and Hannah nodded. She was still panting, and he arms started to tense back up to her chest again. Adam clicked his tongue, "No. Hands on lap, palms up, passive." Hannah paused, struggling to get control over her own body. Slowly, her hands fell back into her lap. He could see the struggle, and he would help her master it.

Adam let her sit there for a moment, watching as her chest quit heaving slowly.

"Good girl. On to position two. Which will be... hands and knees on floor." Adam said. Wordlessly, Hannah slid slowly forward and got on her hands and knees. It was weird seeing her this quiet. Usually she overthought so much she couldn't be quiet. It was like she had to get it all out in one burst.

Adam watched as she shifted uncomfortably on the floor. He saw her mouth open slightly, as if she wanted to speak, and then close as if she stopped herself, "If your uncomfortable, you can get a pillow or something for yours knees. Don't get used to it though. That's the only decision you'll be making tonight."

"O-oh, okay." She said, and stood up and started to walk in the direction of her couch. Adam let her stand on her feet, not chiding her for taking initiative. Only so many rules could be made on the first attempt without stifling the end result. He waited until she was walking past him before grabbing her and squeezing her in a big bear hug.

"You'll be okay kid." Adam said and squeezed her again, "Now go get the pillow." He released her and she walked over to get her couch pillow. Her let her move slowly, noticing how she was stumbling. He wanted to aid her, but realized that she needed to listen and focus on him and his voice. Sometimes when people couldn't focus, they needed a focus point. Hannah dropped the pillow onto the floor and then sunk down onto it. She sighed shakily, looking back up at Adam. This time, her hands were in the correct place, "Good girl. Now let's try that position two again. Hands and knees." Hannah shifted, this time not uncomfortably.

Adam didn't make her wait long. He slowly walked around her, watching her. When he noticed her twitching to count, he snapped his fingers.

"Position three. Lean forward, still on knees, and put your face against the ground, forehead touching. Arms outstretching and palms down. Kinda like your praying." Hannah did so, the stretching feeling good and relieving to her. Adam slowly made her switch between those three positions. He didn't want to add more, he didn't want to overwhelm her. When her breathing was even, he smiled inwardly, "Go to the bed, on yours knees." A little bit of nerves fluttered in Hannah's stomach. She wanted to disobey, if he was going to do anything weird. Slowly, she crawled to the bed, still feeling heavy after the panic. She waited at the bed edge until Adam walked up, kicking his boots off and hopping on. He patted the spot in front of him.

Hannah raised from her knees and got into the bed, facing him and hugging him. This round of crying was just simple crying, no more hyperventilating breaths. Adam didn't try to touch her, or do anything intimate. He held her and stroked her hair. Hannah quit crying much more quickly this time, but she didn't start talking like she normally did. She was quiet and subdued as she leaned against him. Adam let her take her time, stroking her hair gently.

"Well, that was oddly effective." Hannah said quietly, a smidge of embarrassment in her voice. Adam let himself smile this time, kissing on her forehead.

"Hey, just because you don't want to admit the solution to yourself, doesn't mean it isn't a good solution. Master shit is the bomb. Let's you lose control and let someone else pick it up. You, ah, wanna try adding to the move set?"

"Maybe sometime. For now, I kinda just wanna lay here." Almost as one, the two hopped backwards, pulled up the blanket and climbed under. Hannah rolled so she could be the little spoon and put her head on his shoulder. She closed her eyes, more content than she had been in a long while. This is the one thing that she really liked about Adam, she felt like she could just be here weird self, or cuddly self, or sexual self around him. Pretty much all her selves, and he didn't bat an eye. Adam had his issues with her, but they weren't usually about herself. He pretty much never said a mean comment about her, just her actions. It was the coolest, most selfless thing she had ever experienced, and she didn't know how Adam manager to separate those two things.


End file.
